Friday, January 23, 2009

Shopping with her

Disclaimer: All characters (me and she) appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

For so many years, I was a fool to consider myself a well descent gentleman with average style and dressing sense, until my fallacy was brutally broken when I had a chance to go for shopping with her. It was my birthday; I decided to have a new shirt for myself. My friend heard the word ‘Shopping’ through my mouth and expressed her wish to come with me for shopping.
It was decided to meet on a Sunday evening on one of the crowded street of the city. The special about this street was it has plenty of fashion shops. When you say it’s a fashion shop, it includes Skirts, earrings, bangles, and what not. The only job any male would have here would to pay for the things his female partner has selected. Well this street was also had a big mall where you could see a comparably neglected corner of men’s wear. I was suggested and taken to the mall.
We entered the mall and visited the men’s section for my shirt. It really had a huge variety of shirts in all the possible colors.
“So which kind of shirt would you like to wear?” She asked me.
“Anything which suits me and is comfortable”, that was my nice escape to the question as I never realized that they have different kinds in shirts.
It was nice collection; I just picked one of the shirts I liked and already decided to buy it. Just for the confirmation I asked her about her opinion about my choice.
“This is kind of ok, but not which you should really buy, It’s too loud”, her.
I wish I could hear what she heard so loudly. Well if she says so there must be something wrong with the shirt so I decided to choose other shirt which would be quieter than the previous. I went through some more shirts and I picked another shirt. I proudly turned to her to show my second choice, neglecting the fact that the shirt I had chosen earlier was still my favorite among the rest.
My expectations were welcomed with a so discouraging comment, “You are just choosing the shirt like my maid’s son wears”.
I never thought the shirt was so bad, but I thought, she indeed knows about the fashion, doesn’t everybody care about what her or his maid’s son wears.
I tried to look for some better shirts, every time my efforts wear slashed with different comments; the only similarity in those different comments was, all were proving that my choice of apparels is even worse than her maid’s son.
“Well then why don’t you select a shirt for me, (if you think you know better about everything, and the person in front of you is a dumbass and stupid, beside the truth that even he wasn’t naked for all these years since he born, excluding some initial stages of his childhood) and I would love to wear something of your choice (even if I look like an elephant dressed for the a marriage ceremony so that another fool can ride it)” the irony is, you can’t say everything you can write in the brackets.
“Well, I will show you, what the actual gentle man wears” indirectly it means you are not a gentleman. Does she think I can’t read between the lines?
Although in the unexpressed rage I asked her to choose a shirt for me, but I didn’t realize that time what a mistake I had already made. She just went on a mission of analyzing each shirt to find at least three faults in each shirt; every fault was different than all of other faults. One shirt was peach blue; the other was royal blue, and some other was somewhat else blue. If someone would have asked me, I would have said all the seven shirts are blue, but who the hell was asking me, what I would like to wear.
We went through all the possible things in the mall which can be named as ‘a shirt’ or somewhere near to ‘a shirt’, but the great lady was not ready to make her decision. I still thought that the shirt I chose for the first time was the best of all I would like to wear. In a hope of her mind would change about that shirt, I tried to make some small efforts to revisit the shirt, but her facial expression made some unsaid sentences that I didn’t dare to go back to that shirt.
Finally she liked some two or three shirts and she asked me to try it. After I tried those on me she rejected those with some other excuses. By this time we are done with the whole section, without having anything in our shopping bag. She had a feeling that some other section could have men appeals, so I was taken to the other section. That section had many colorful things like skirts, earrings, suits, bangles, and some other things (I didn’t really know what they are called).
“Isn’t this nice?” she asked me without even looking at me.
“Yes, it is very beautiful” I said without even looking at the skirt.
After that somehow she forgot that we wear there to buy a shirt for me and I had to reply to all of her questions about the skirts, although any of my opinions didn’t matter at all, I answered with different words in the same sentence, ‘It is nice’, ‘It is great’, ‘It is beautiful’. After spending three hours in that mall at last we are done with the shopping, she bought a pair skirt and jeans for her.
And then, suddenly she realized why we were here, “Oh god, we still haven’t decided upon your shirt. You are so slow yaar, can’t even you choose a single shirt in three hours, you should learn something from me and….”
“I would have done that, but….”, before I could complete my sentence, I heard an announcement requesting to leave the mall as it is almost the time to close. I ran to the men’s section neglecting what she was still talking about my choice. I looked for the shirt I liked for the first time, and found that it was already sold!

1 comment:

kaps said...

Good one..keep it up..
I remember someone has said it ;)
the best way to punish a women is by giving her all the gold ornaments, beautiful dresses etc etc (even I don't know the etc etc)..and not giving her mirror to look at - how she looks !!..may be while shopping you can try this..u'll save some time :)